Redemption: A Calling

This is my road to redemption.

Aum is the last. The door that starts my path to my glory. The path that will cleanse me and I shall attain forgiveness at the very end.

I was busy playing around and letting myself go. I took the easy way and spent money like it meant nothing. I gain weight, lost myself to drinking. 

Then I met her. Something moved in my heart. I did not understand. I allowed my buddy to talk and hang out with her. I was too busy making out with another girl in front of her.
I was high, drunk and did not have a care in this world then. 

Later on, every time we met, my heart kept hurting. I felt anger at how she was treated by my buddy. I felt ashamed for not standing up for her. In the end, this hurt took the better of me and I told him off. I put a stop to the nonsense, and took her with me.

Since then I have been with her and only her. I have no interest in any other girl. I only care about this beautiful lady sitting beside me, in my arms and I want to protect her from the entire world and it's cruelness. 

I cannot imagine not being with her and at the same time, I am not the best she deserves. 

I am run down, haggard, shell of the man I used to be. I am broke, in debt, drunk, over weight and what could I have to offer her. 

I have been so lost in my thoughts until last night.

Was it a dream? A conversation? 

It was more like a path being shown. A road to redemption for this sinner. 

I have not been good to anyone including myself.

I am a talker. Talking the talk but never doing the action. 

But now I have my path. 

I have my direction. 

My first punishment has been set. 

The glutton in me needs to be punished and killed for this is the righteous path that I am. 

I need to bring myself into the path and to stay on it.

I need to grow up and be the man that is worthy of her. 

This is Day 1. 

And there is many days to go until my end reaches me.